When I Loved You
by CyanGalaxy
Summary: Anakin and Ahsoka... and what could have been. So many different realities, so many different times, so many different endings. (A few short dabbles. Not Anisoka)
**Okay, I'll Come Back**

Her master held out the Padawan beads, as she was overpowered by conflict: _leave or stay_ —those were the options. She wanted to become a Jedi so bad, it was all she ever wanted...until now. Her heart was telling her to stay, to be with her master, her friends, her life. It was the decision everyone expected her to choose, meaning to go with the other choice would be dreadful—even startling herself.

Yet, her head was screaming 'leave'—including the Force itself. The Jedi didn't trust her, so it wasn't fair to be surrounded by people who would have to depend on her, to believe in her, to protected her... And who she would depend on, believe in and be protected by.

 _This isn't right,_ she told herself. She shouldn't have to make the decision of abandoning everyone and everything she's ever known, just because it was the 'right' thing to do...but then again, she'll be miserable and depressed either way.

The Force wouldn't stop shouting as she reached for her beads. Her Master's widening, blue eyes and faint smile almost drowned out the shrieks, but as she touched the beads in his hand and said, "Okay, I'll come back," with a fake plastered smile, the Force and her mind and heart all ached from her choosing a regretful path. She needed to be free—she realised that too late. Ahsoka was overruled by emotion, attachment, or just maybe she couldn't stand to stare at the sorrowful, blue eyes that would haunt her for the rest of her life, if she told him 'goodbye'.

 **Selfish Sacrifice**

The red lightsaber was meant to attack her—not him, meant to impale her—not him, meant to burn her—not him, meant to murder her—not him...but to be honest, things never turn out the way they're supposed to, now do they?

Their training bond snapped dead, as the breathing, living Anakin Skywalker died with it, leaving the other half of that bond broken, sorrowful and distorted.

She just watched her former master's eyes go dark with emptiness and while her own were replaced by fury...cold-hearted, hateful, agonisingly painful, torturous, acidic fury.

His last act was that of protectiveness, loyalty...sacrifice, but she knew the _real_ reason behind the 'loving' self-sacrifice. He knew she was going to die. He knew she wouldn't make it out of this battle alive. He knew he would be alone—alone without his dearest Padawan. So, he made sure it was _him_ instead of her. _He_ was the one being sacrificed. _He_ was the one diving into oblivion, Because _he_ couldn't face life without his apprentice. It was his fault he couldn't let go of attachment, so he would rather die (and take her place), than her die, and him being the broken one. His fault he couldn't let go of attachment, and Ahsoka was the one that had to pay...and never had she felt so enraged.

 **The One Called 'Soka'**

Maybe it could've been simpler, as if the galaxy found peace within the conflict and therefore a matured Togruta with two little younglings—the Skywalker twins—by her feet, entertaining them with the magical power of the Force, floating their father's lightsaber in mid air when Anakin wasn't looking.

The two children giggled as the one they called 'Soka' hid a mischievous grin when her Master faked a scolding scowl at her. She didn't care, and just threw one of the many bantha stuffed toys at him.

It seemed to carry on with various soft toys being lightly thrown around—even Luke and Leia joined in, too, ganging up on their father with Ahsoka's probably bad influences.

"Ha, Skyguy! Betrayed by your own children."

"Yeah.. Sk- Skyguy," Mimicked Luke and Leia, not even knowing what they were talking about—just copying Soka.

Anakin raised an eyebrow, almost looking shocked, then just rolling his eyes at his Padawan, playfully.

 **Duo of the Dark Side**

Vader and Cyra ruled the universe together. They fought back to back, were as powerful as ever; skilful, cunning warriors of the Force... Much like Anakin and Ahsoka were before they were both destroyed and consumed by the ever growing darkness inside.

They were the dynamic duo of the galaxy... And in a way, still are. Yet their allegiances turn towards the Galactic Empire and not the failed and corrupted Republic.

Before they were both weak, manipulated, turned against, betrayed; but since engulfing the darkness, it has made them powerful, stronger, resilient and feared throughout the galaxy by all. Ruling as Master and Apprentice, they are the physical representation of the Dark Side.

Some people who once knew Vader and Cyra before their fall, said that they were great Jedi, but lost their way...and maybe can be returned to the Light through redemption.

In actuality, it's far more complex than that, though. Both fallen Jedi hardly remember those good times on the Light Side; The way they used to care about each other, the way they used to save each other, the way they used to love each other... Now Vader and Cyra are powerful, but rarely even have a conversation. Hell, it's like they're just a shadow of what they used to be...a darkness. Now, it's pretty safe to say, that they sometimes even forget their real names are Anakin and Ahsoka.

 **Brother**

"You were my brother, Anakin!" She shouted with fierce tears in her glazing blue eyes, staring at the yellow irises of the broken man she had just defeated by the lava stream. His groans of pain quickly became screams of agony, as the fire engulfed his body, the smell of burnt flesh, hair and cloth polluting the heavy air. "I loved you."

His only remaining limp—the mechanical one—reached out in front, trying to communicate in anyway whatsoever, grabbing the rock and ash.

Ahsoka saw his silent plea. He knew he was going to die, but maybe he just wanted it to be over quickly—to end the excruciating burning...so the girl accepted his request, and dived his own blue blade through his singed back. It was such relief to feel it, he regretted yelling 'I hate you!'.

If it was Anakin, Ahsoka wouldn't have done it, but it was Vader. Her brother died a long time ago...

•••

 **A/N**

 **Most of these are sad, but oh well. I hope they're still alright. I don't know what it was called, but it was a fanfic where Ahsoka was dreaming about Anakin/Vader that inspired me to write this.**

 **Requests are always welcomed.**

 **May the Force be with you**

 **-CyanGalaxy**


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